Quality of Life Part 2

18th August 2019

Dr Lennon’s Sunday Musings

Last week, we discussed about the quality of life of pets and using that information to decide when is the appropriate time for euthanasia. In this article, we will discuss about your quality of life, the carer, the wonderful pet owner. There is a term ‘Caring for the carer’ coined by Andrew Hale (Dog trainer) which is extremely relevant in this context.

It would be fair to say that you are good at gauging the quality of life of your pets and making the right decision at the right time. You are great carers of your pets. However, who is caring for you, the carer?

In the bond between you and your pet, there lay not one but two parties involved in the bond. The quality of life of you, the pet owner, is just as important as your pet’s. We must not forget to take care of ourselves.

I once treated an 8 year old cat that suffered from kidney failure belonging to a family with two toddlers. This cat was urinating inappropriately at multiple occasions during the day and night in the house because of her kidneys. Her owners, a young couple, struggled for months, trying to keep their house clean and smell free. It was a bit of a health hazard especially with their toddlers. They felt helpless and despair at the same time. It was only when they made the decision to rehome their cat to someone who was more equipped to take care of her special needs, did they manage to remain sane. They felt relieved and guilt at the same time. It took months before they finally accepted that they had made the right choice for their quality of life was suffering when they were trying to accommodate their pet.

Another incident involved a 4 year old Husky that had attacked his owner’s daughter. It had been a slightly reactive dog since being rescued when he was 2 years old. His owner had always been able to manage him without issue and he has never attempted to show aggression towards his owner. However, he attacked and bit his owner’s daughter for no apparent reason. This act really damaged the trust between his owner and him. At last, his owner made a very difficult decision to have him euthanased due to the mistrust and the inability to rehome him. It was an extremely difficult time for his owner and his quality of life suffered before and after making the difficult decision.

It is always an extremely difficult topic regarding quality of life. It is equally contentious to determine whose quality of life is more important, the pet or its carer. On one hand, some people may say that we choose to have pets to improve our own quality of life and thus, we come first in consideration of quality of life and is our quality of life is infringed; we make decisions to improve our situation. On the other hand, others may argue that we have a responsibility to the pet that we have elected to take on and regardless of situation; we have to do everything in our power to ensure that their quality of life is preserved even if it means that ours may be compromised as a result. So, which party is right?

Personally, I have seen pet owners who have bend over backwards, compromised their happiness, starved as they have spent all their money into their pets and even suffered from anxiety, stress and depression trying to maintain their pet’s quality of life. When is it counted too much? Where do we draw the line that says that enough is enough? Do we even draw the line at all?

In my personal opinion, we have a responsibility to ourselves (and human family) first and foremost. If we are not able to take care of ourselves, we are doing our (human) family a disservice. Also, when we are not well, ether physically or mentally, the pets that we love will pick that up as well and be affected. We need to care for the carer. We must not forget about ourselves. It can be very easy to get carried away to care for another and neglect ourselves in the process. Let’s be kind to ourselves.

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